Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Top 10 Tuesday: Most Unfortunate Character Names according to Connie

It's Tuesday! That means another Top 10 Tuesday, an original meme hosted by our friends over at the Broke and Bookish. This week, I, Connie, attempt to take on the top ten most unfortunate character names. Some are funny, some are strange, and a couple of them are just kind of gross.


Mike Fallopian & Mucho Maas -- The Crying of Lot 49 by Thomas Pynchon: One of the joys of the post-modernists is the fact that their tongue-in-cheekness knows no boundary

Hiro Protagonist -- Snow Crash by Neal Stephenson: probably trying to give Pynchon a run on subtlety

Huckleberry Finn -- The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain: I know, I know, it's a classic. But when was the last time you really stopped to think about that name? Reminds me of an equally unfortunate, non-fictional person I used to go to school with who was called "Finbar Murphy." We called him "Finny." Finny, if you're out there, I'm sorry.

Humber Humbert -- Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov: Well, now, that's just repetitive, and redundant.

"It" -- A Child Called It by Dave Pelzer: Now, I have never read this book, so I have no idea if people actually called him "it", but regardless, let's just say I can think of other names I'd rather be called. Like Watermelon. Or Sloof Poof.

Quigley Quagmire (and the other two parts of this set of triplets, Isadora and Duncan) -- A Series of Unfortunate Events by Lemony Snickett: Isadora and Duncan, MAYBE, but you must have been reeeaaaally pissed by the time you gave birth to your third child in a few minutes to name him Quigley, let alone Quigley Quagmire.

Octopussy -- James Bond 007: Octopussy by Ian Fleming: blegh. Don't think about this one for too long. *shudder*

Truly Scrumptious -- Chitty Chitty Bang Bang by Ian Fleming: Your mother must never have heard of The Big Bad Wolf or the witch from Hansel and Gretel, both of whom, should you come across them, would just love to eat you up

Hermione Granger -- Harry Potter series by JK Rowling: be honest -- how many of us argued over the pronunciation of her name before the movies came out? I heard everything from "her-mee-own" to "her-moyn" to "-er-minnie"

Weeny, the Gnomelet -- The 13 1/2 Lives of Captain Bluebear by Walter Moers: I don't care how "mature" you are; it's funny